Men’s Devotional

This devotional was given at the February 2020 Men’s Breakfast.

1. What is biblical masculinity? 

Did you know that there is nowhere in the Bible where you can go and say, this is masculinity? Let me give you an example of what I mean. You can go to Genesis 2-3 and find the roles of a husband and wife. A woman must submit to the man who is the leader of the household. Right? That is a popular understanding of “masculinity.” So does that mean then that I didn’t become truly masculine until I had a wife? Do you see the issue? Most of the scripture we would go to on how to be a man is more about a role we play in the family. Son, Husband, Father, grandfather. Not, this is what it means to be a man. 

• When you were a boy, what did you want to be when you grew up?

Boys don’t dream of becoming benchwarmers. They don’t dream of shuffling papers or sitting on sidelines. They dream of slaying dragons, rescuing princesses, hitting grand slams, and killing bad guys. Boys are hardwired for the pursuit of glory. And they should be.

But as boys grow up into young men, they often find themselves in work clothes instead of battle attire — on the bench rather than on the field. It’s crushing. But what’s worse is that even with this disappointing reality in full view, the dream itself refuses to die. Men watch war movies and envision themselves in the trenches; they attend football games and cannot help but wonder. 

How does a man cope with a dream that won’t die?

Us men have an internal ambition to glory. We pursue lives that satisfy the desires of our inner wants. This may bleed into a few areas. . . 

We pursue one of three things: wealth, power, and sex. While it is easy to call those three things out, it is harder to actually call it out in reality or to see it seep into our daily lives. For example, power or fame can be pursued in who you know and who knows what. Do you feed off of being the guy who always knows a guy? Wealth pursuits lead to men staying late at work, further distancing yourself from your family at home. And sex, we treat women as the weaker gender or as objects to drool at rather than as co-created bearers of the image of God.

Yet for many more men, the discouragement of dream-chasing is far too much to bear, and they would rather just concede and watch the dream drift out to sea. Slain by the sword of second-string roles and backseat boredom, they take their place on the couch alongside Homer Simpson, Archie Bunker, and a multitude of other emasculated dropouts. Meanwhile, Satan laughs as he picks up their swords and adds them to his trophy case of broken men.

Sudden onset reality

What I have found is that men can fall into two different camps once they buy into this lie from Satan. They fall into either the selfish dreamer or a deadbeat dropout. Are you one of these men?

Are you a Selfish Dreamer?

A Selfish dreamer is someone who cares only about what glory their ambition can deliver.

Or… are you a… 

Deadbeat dropout?

Someone who sits on their couch, watches tv all day, disengaged from family, friends, and faith fulfilling the vision of the dumb dad on a lot of modern television shows?

Fortunately, that is not the only two options. And where I’d like to take us to in order to consider is what truly is biblical masculinity. 

I’m a part of a Facebook group called Pursuit of Manliness. Its creator is a ministry colleague of mine and he claims the pursuit of the page is to chase after biblical manliness. What I have found on that page are a lot of great men who just want to be strong Christian leaders in their homes and help on how to do that. But I have also found some men on this page are looking for justification for their version of masculinity that matches a particular demographic or type of alpha-male that is untamed and rough around the edges, a man who belittles the expression of emotion, prefers course language, and wants to spit, scratch themselves, and ya know, do as the men do. But that is not biblical masculinity. Pursuing wealth, power, and sex is not biblical masculinity. At the same time, sitting on the couch is not biblical masculinity, neglecting responsibility, or not contributing any meaning to the family is not biblical masculinity.

So what is biblical masculinity? Because it really has nothing to do with how strong you are, what clothes you wear, movies you like, sports you participate in, or what you eat. 

Convey Strength (1 Corinthians 16:13-14)

¹³ Be on the alert, stand firm in the faith, act like men, be strong. ¹⁴ Let all that you do be done in love. ¹⁵ Now I urge you, brethren (you know the household of Stephanas, that they were the first fruits of Achaia, and that they have devoted themselves for ministry to the saints), ¹⁶ that you also be in subjection to such men and to everyone who helps in the work and labors. ¹⁷ I rejoice over the coming of Stephanas and Fortunatus and Achaicus, because they have supplied what was lacking on your part. ¹⁸ For they have refreshed my spirit and yours. Therefore acknowledge such men.

This is a strength-focused on doing what is right and avoids what is wrong. This is more mental strength, like courage than it is who you can beat in an arm-wrestling contest. And notice it says the men should do all things in love. It is a sacrificial love toward all others and to put aside your own ideas of glory for the glory of the Kingdom of God. To do that requires real strength. 

Arbiter of Godly Justice (Micah 6:8)

He has told you, O man, what is good; And what does the Lord require of you But to do justice, to love kindness, And to walk humbly with your God?

The justice here is that of social justice, not to praise the punishment those who have done crimes. Micah is conveying this message to men that they are to serve those who are in need and to help them out of the terrible situation they are in. How do we do this? With kindness toward others. And when we are kind to others, we are putting ourselves in a posture of humility toward our creator who humbled himself before all mankind by dying on a cross to help us out of a desperate situation called sin and death. 

And finally, 

Stability (Ephesians 4:13-14)

¹³ until we all attain to the unity of the faith, and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to a mature man, to the measure of the stature which belongs to the fullness of Christ. ¹⁴ As a result, we are no longer to be children, tossed here and thereby waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by the trickery of men, by craftiness in deceitful scheming;

Finally, it is laid upon the men to keep moving forward when everyone and everything around you is going awry. This is the case in tragic life events, faith in the home, and in business. Keep calm, know that God is in charge, and convey that to others around you. 

Let’s pray.